life happens

sometimes, you make plans.  plans that make really good sense.  plans that you want to go a certain way.  but life happens.

i don't want this blog to just be an account of all the nice and pretty things in my life.  i want it to be an account of my life.  to look back and reflect on.  to learn from...

well, here's a message for myself:  don't get so wrapped up in the plans.  sometimes things don't unfold the way they are expected to go... they don't come to fruition.

so i am sad -- sad for the reason the plans fell through, and selfishly sad the plans fell through.  and i feel guilty for feeling sad... ahhh, the guilt of a mother.

so, i am taking today as a "sad" day.  one where i have given myself permission to be bummed out.  to not look for the good.  to have a pity party.  i can try to be happy tomorrow.  tomorrow, i will tell myself about all the other chances that i will have for a break.  and tomorrow, i won't think about how it has been over 2 years since i have had a vacation {not a trip, a vacation -- you know, one where you are not concerned about diapers, bathrooms, sleeping schedules, or what is on the menu at a restaurant that will work...}

but, vacation aside, i will also continue to be sad for the loss that led to the getaway falling apart, and the grief of someone very dear to me.

soooo... friends who know what's going on... whatcha doin' this weekend?  want company?

and really, although i desperately need a break {i had an epiphany the other day:  school will start in the fall.  sweet glorious school} it isn't so bad to hang out with these two--



and like my mother in law said after not having seen them in 6 days, "it's like savannah's a whole new baby"  so, there you have it.  maybe i would have missed them too much to be gone.  who knows.

check back tomorrow for the happy version of myself...